GOING....
GOING......
GONE!!!!This is for my beautiful neighbor Laura:) Her "baby" Beau on Easter. He looks so cute! To Laura, God bless you. Many, many little miracles your way and all around you:) Smooches Pookie.
Monday, March 31, 2008
Saturday, March 29, 2008
Bunny Day Pix
Lu, Aurora and Auburn coloring Easter eggs.
Yes, Lu got a special Easter gift, a new bike. She'd long outgrown the old one.
Bunny love!
The bunny sure brings a beautiful basket.
Mommy's Easter outfit. And behind us, serious spring cleaning time!
Bestest friends:)
What a lovely couple....couple of what I don't know:)Maybe it's the spring and we're twitterpated!
Lu shows off her pretty dress and her pretty self.
Scruffy helps Lu find eggs at Laura's house. She was so happy all day and had the best Easter! Lucy that is, not Scruffy, although I'm sure Scruffy enjoyed herself as well.
Lu shows off her pretty dress and her pretty self.
Scruffy helps Lu find eggs at Laura's house. She was so happy all day and had the best Easter! Lucy that is, not Scruffy, although I'm sure Scruffy enjoyed herself as well.Saturday, March 22, 2008
No Good Deed Goes Unpunished
So, we spent the week preparing for Easter and, seeing as it's my favorite holiday, enjoying the process. We went to see Pop on Thursday and ran into Tom and Barbara as they were leaving. I will admit, we were pretty cold but seriously, I just really needed some time to not be around them until I could work through my feelings. Barbara tried to get me to give her a hug and wasn't thrilled when I told her I'd prefer not to. On Friday, Danny sent them the bill for Pop's rent, Barbara and Agnes (aunt) are the one's with access to his social security check. He also included about $150 worth of bills for things we've recently purchased for Pop. Normally we don't ask for any back but just last week Barbara insisted (to Danny) she would cover anything we needed and to let her know.
Today, we brought an Easter basket to Pop and were in really good moods, he was happy and talking a lot. Then we get home and Barbara calls and leaves a message stating that we can take the $80,000 they loaned us for our house and pay for Pop's care. Danny called her back to tell her that the two had nothing to do with eachother and to make sure she was going to send the check so Pop didn't get kicked out. She told him they wanted all the money we owe them by April 1st. She hung up after cussing and saying some really nasty things. She called back and I picked up and she proceeded to threaten to sue us and then she told me she was going to call child services about the way we're raising Lu and to expect someone to show up. At that point I got really mad and told her she better not mess with my daughter.
Finally, Danny got a hold of Tom who informed us that we had written him off (he never once bothered to call and talk to us or to see if we were upset) and that he wanted us to sell our house and give him the money back in 15 days. "Where are we supposed to go?" Danny asked. He didn't respond and kept saying he wanted the money, plus interest. Finally, during a second phone call (that Danny made to assure Pop's rent would be paid) he told us we didn't have to sell just refinance and get him the money. Or we can pay for Pop's care (where the money they get for his social security would go I don't know).
It's so nice that after all we did for Pop, this is the way they thank us. Of course Barbara told Danny we didn't do anything. The actual words that were spoken during the phone calls are too inappropriate for here but basically, instead of trying to sit down and understand our side of things, they decided we were being mean and should just get over it.
I am determined to have a wonderful Easter and to remember the true meaning but goodness, sometimes spiritual battles feel more like wars! Thank you all for your faithful prayers and please continue to send them up for us. Happy Easter. I'll post pix of our day next week and I can't wait to see all of yours.
Today, we brought an Easter basket to Pop and were in really good moods, he was happy and talking a lot. Then we get home and Barbara calls and leaves a message stating that we can take the $80,000 they loaned us for our house and pay for Pop's care. Danny called her back to tell her that the two had nothing to do with eachother and to make sure she was going to send the check so Pop didn't get kicked out. She told him they wanted all the money we owe them by April 1st. She hung up after cussing and saying some really nasty things. She called back and I picked up and she proceeded to threaten to sue us and then she told me she was going to call child services about the way we're raising Lu and to expect someone to show up. At that point I got really mad and told her she better not mess with my daughter.
Finally, Danny got a hold of Tom who informed us that we had written him off (he never once bothered to call and talk to us or to see if we were upset) and that he wanted us to sell our house and give him the money back in 15 days. "Where are we supposed to go?" Danny asked. He didn't respond and kept saying he wanted the money, plus interest. Finally, during a second phone call (that Danny made to assure Pop's rent would be paid) he told us we didn't have to sell just refinance and get him the money. Or we can pay for Pop's care (where the money they get for his social security would go I don't know).
It's so nice that after all we did for Pop, this is the way they thank us. Of course Barbara told Danny we didn't do anything. The actual words that were spoken during the phone calls are too inappropriate for here but basically, instead of trying to sit down and understand our side of things, they decided we were being mean and should just get over it.
I am determined to have a wonderful Easter and to remember the true meaning but goodness, sometimes spiritual battles feel more like wars! Thank you all for your faithful prayers and please continue to send them up for us. Happy Easter. I'll post pix of our day next week and I can't wait to see all of yours.
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
Patty's Day Fun
Being Irish and all, St. Patrick's Day is important to me. I like to wear my green hair/head pieces and Kiss Me I'm Irish buttons and shirts or shamrock socks! For many years it was a celebration with my parents (while Lennon is the name of this generation of family, my great grandfather held the last name Ryan and even my biological father's last name is Meehan-Irish Spanish:)) where we were served Cornbeef and Cabbage, both of which I hate!
This year, I got to do it my way, green tablecloth and cups, clover plates and napkins, Irish Beef Stew (turned out really yummy), Herbed Irish Soda Bread, some kind of chocolate tapioca dessert, cupcakes with green frosting and decorated with Irish pictures (and one alien courtesy of Danny), and lastly, a big pitcher of 7-up mixed with pomegranate seltzer, colored green. Of course I only invited a couple of neighbors so we're going to be eating cupcakes until we're green in the face! But it turned out to be a lovely evening with celtic music playing in the background. My favorite is Loreena McKennitt. I especially love the way she sings "The Lady of Shalott".
One of our neighbors invited us to her house for Easter which is nice because I hadn't even really thought about what we were going to do later on in the day. We feel blessed.
This year, I got to do it my way, green tablecloth and cups, clover plates and napkins, Irish Beef Stew (turned out really yummy), Herbed Irish Soda Bread, some kind of chocolate tapioca dessert, cupcakes with green frosting and decorated with Irish pictures (and one alien courtesy of Danny), and lastly, a big pitcher of 7-up mixed with pomegranate seltzer, colored green. Of course I only invited a couple of neighbors so we're going to be eating cupcakes until we're green in the face! But it turned out to be a lovely evening with celtic music playing in the background. My favorite is Loreena McKennitt. I especially love the way she sings "The Lady of Shalott".
One of our neighbors invited us to her house for Easter which is nice because I hadn't even really thought about what we were going to do later on in the day. We feel blessed.
Sunday, March 16, 2008
Happy Green Day From the Little People
Happy St. Patrick's Day from wee Lennon's:) and may your Haggis always be truly NASTY!!!!
Irish Blessing
May the roads rise to meet you,
May the winds always be at your back,
May the sun shine warm upon your face,
The rains fall soft upon your fields,
And until we meet again,
May God hold you in the hollow
of His hand.
An Irish Prayer
May God give you...
For every storm, a rainbow,
For every tear, a smile,
For every care, a promise,
And a blessing in each trial.
For every problem life sends,
A faithful friend to share,
For every sigh, a sweet song,
And an answer for each prayer.
Irish Blessing
May the roads rise to meet you,
May the winds always be at your back,
May the sun shine warm upon your face,
The rains fall soft upon your fields,
And until we meet again,
May God hold you in the hollow
of His hand.
An Irish Prayer
May God give you...
For every storm, a rainbow,
For every tear, a smile,
For every care, a promise,
And a blessing in each trial.
For every problem life sends,
A faithful friend to share,
For every sigh, a sweet song,
And an answer for each prayer.
Thursday, March 13, 2008
Big Blessing in Disguise!
So yesterday morning Danny calls me and says he'd pulling off his job because Pop was being taken to the ER at Kaiser. His sweet nurse, Millie, was concerned because he seemed lethargic and appeared to be holding his chest and slurring his words. Danny stopped by to check in on him and he seemed fine. So, he came up to get me. We dropped Lucy off at a sweetheart of a neighbors house and headed down. Pop was in really good spirits and kept laughing and making faces at us.
I still haven't spoken to my parents since the original Pop issue but Danny gave my dad a quick call (next time we'll ask the nurse to) in the morning to let him know what was going on. Still to our dismay, he laughed and sounded all happy and blew it off like it was nothing and said he might get cut off because he was arriving at his destination and parking underground. We didn't hear from him again (Barbara called the nurse at the board and care facility but she didn't know anymore than we were telling her) until 5:00Pm when we were heading home from the hospital. Danny asked if he was going to stop by and he said probably not because he had to drive up to L.A. for a job and had to run home first. We were thinking, well gee, take five minutes to say hi on the way up. We found out later (I was on the phone with Kat who hadn't even been told Pop was in the hospital) that Barbara and Tom were having dinner at a restaurant before he left for L.A.. So sad that he didn't have time for Pop.
Ok, so believe it or not, despite the fact that I felt really sorry for their behavior, especially for Pop's sake, I didn't allow myself to get all upset (Danny was) and best of all, some good came out of his hospital visit. First, he was acting "off" because he had a Urinary Tract Infection (UTI) and when elderly people get that, they can become disoriented. He's had that before and some antibiotics should clear it all up in no time. But since he was already there, they ran every test imaginable and since he isn't able to easily go to the doctor, I was really glad to know what was going on inside him. He does have C(ongestive) H(eart) F(ailure) but his heart is still pretty much the same. However, about 6 months ago, at the Lennon house, I went to visit and we all agreed that Pop seemed a bit altered. His mouth was going to the side and he was slurring a bit. Having experienced the stroke with my dad, it came to mind. But we did some of the other tests to see if he had any other signs and he didn't. He was fine a couple hours later.
Well, to make an incredibly short point, long, the head scan yesterday did show he'd had a minor stroke. Poor Pop has been having some trouble getting his sentences/ thoughts out entirely and we all noticed his throat sounded a bit flemy, causing him to clear it sometimes when he eats. These are most likely stroke related. The doctor was really sweet and called us on the way home to recommend a different medicine that was a blood thinner. I'm praying that it will help his brain become a bit more clear so he can think and communicate better. I woke up feeling so thankful (the hospital called saying they're going to discharge him after lunch) that we were able to get these tests done for him and that maybe now, whatever life God has left for him will be more enjoyable. Also, perhaps we'll get a little more of our Pop back.
On the way home yesterday, Danny and I were talking about how Italian's are supposed to be all about family and blood. In the end, Danny thinks of Pop in regards to being his grandpa/ family, more than he ever did his own grandfathers. And ironically, Pop is being loved and cared for most by his grandson (in-law) and his "adopted" grandaugther. Where's the rest of the family? We also laughed about how everyone keeps saying we'll be rewarded for this (in Heaven I guess is what they mean). That's nice and all but this is Pop we're talking about. It doesn't take a saint to do right by him. The man deserves it! He's been better to us than anyone else in our family and has shown nothing but love and respect to us, how could we give any less back now that he needs us?
Today Lu and I are going out for a mom and daughter day of lunch and shopping. She's excited and it's a beautiful day for an outside mall. Later, I promised to bring Pop some Irish Creamer for his coffee:)
I still haven't spoken to my parents since the original Pop issue but Danny gave my dad a quick call (next time we'll ask the nurse to) in the morning to let him know what was going on. Still to our dismay, he laughed and sounded all happy and blew it off like it was nothing and said he might get cut off because he was arriving at his destination and parking underground. We didn't hear from him again (Barbara called the nurse at the board and care facility but she didn't know anymore than we were telling her) until 5:00Pm when we were heading home from the hospital. Danny asked if he was going to stop by and he said probably not because he had to drive up to L.A. for a job and had to run home first. We were thinking, well gee, take five minutes to say hi on the way up. We found out later (I was on the phone with Kat who hadn't even been told Pop was in the hospital) that Barbara and Tom were having dinner at a restaurant before he left for L.A.. So sad that he didn't have time for Pop.
Ok, so believe it or not, despite the fact that I felt really sorry for their behavior, especially for Pop's sake, I didn't allow myself to get all upset (Danny was) and best of all, some good came out of his hospital visit. First, he was acting "off" because he had a Urinary Tract Infection (UTI) and when elderly people get that, they can become disoriented. He's had that before and some antibiotics should clear it all up in no time. But since he was already there, they ran every test imaginable and since he isn't able to easily go to the doctor, I was really glad to know what was going on inside him. He does have C(ongestive) H(eart) F(ailure) but his heart is still pretty much the same. However, about 6 months ago, at the Lennon house, I went to visit and we all agreed that Pop seemed a bit altered. His mouth was going to the side and he was slurring a bit. Having experienced the stroke with my dad, it came to mind. But we did some of the other tests to see if he had any other signs and he didn't. He was fine a couple hours later.
Well, to make an incredibly short point, long, the head scan yesterday did show he'd had a minor stroke. Poor Pop has been having some trouble getting his sentences/ thoughts out entirely and we all noticed his throat sounded a bit flemy, causing him to clear it sometimes when he eats. These are most likely stroke related. The doctor was really sweet and called us on the way home to recommend a different medicine that was a blood thinner. I'm praying that it will help his brain become a bit more clear so he can think and communicate better. I woke up feeling so thankful (the hospital called saying they're going to discharge him after lunch) that we were able to get these tests done for him and that maybe now, whatever life God has left for him will be more enjoyable. Also, perhaps we'll get a little more of our Pop back.
On the way home yesterday, Danny and I were talking about how Italian's are supposed to be all about family and blood. In the end, Danny thinks of Pop in regards to being his grandpa/ family, more than he ever did his own grandfathers. And ironically, Pop is being loved and cared for most by his grandson (in-law) and his "adopted" grandaugther. Where's the rest of the family? We also laughed about how everyone keeps saying we'll be rewarded for this (in Heaven I guess is what they mean). That's nice and all but this is Pop we're talking about. It doesn't take a saint to do right by him. The man deserves it! He's been better to us than anyone else in our family and has shown nothing but love and respect to us, how could we give any less back now that he needs us?
Today Lu and I are going out for a mom and daughter day of lunch and shopping. She's excited and it's a beautiful day for an outside mall. Later, I promised to bring Pop some Irish Creamer for his coffee:)
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Ketchup!
I have been very naughty about posting pictures so here you go....KETCHUP!
Lu's tinkerbell/fairy b-day cake. Friend Auburn's b-day was three days after so we had two combined-ish parties.
Too early in the morning (why we all look a bit sleepy) brother Michael visits with his lovely girlfriend Alex.
Lu (after her play) at Denny's with friends Aurora and Auburn (and not seen Laura and Kami).
Lu (with glowing eyes) as an explorer in CYT's (class Our Gang) George of the Jungle/ Tarzan. She had two speaking lines and a solo in "Hey hey we're the Monkey's".
Lu & Scruffy (Scruffy had a camoflauge shirt/ dress and also took part in the play, at one point even doing the hand motions) ready for the play...Lu got four pink (they look more red) highlights at the salon for a b-day present. Just because you're in the jungle doesn't mean you have an excuse not to look your best:)
Well, at least I look cute! What IS Danny doing? It's a little creepy.
Lu's tinkerbell/fairy b-day cake. Friend Auburn's b-day was three days after so we had two combined-ish parties.
Too early in the morning (why we all look a bit sleepy) brother Michael visits with his lovely girlfriend Alex.
Lu (after her play) at Denny's with friends Aurora and Auburn (and not seen Laura and Kami).
Lu (with glowing eyes) as an explorer in CYT's (class Our Gang) George of the Jungle/ Tarzan. She had two speaking lines and a solo in "Hey hey we're the Monkey's". 
Lu & Scruffy (Scruffy had a camoflauge shirt/ dress and also took part in the play, at one point even doing the hand motions) ready for the play...Lu got four pink (they look more red) highlights at the salon for a b-day present. Just because you're in the jungle doesn't mean you have an excuse not to look your best:) 
Well, at least I look cute! What IS Danny doing? It's a little creepy.
Thursday, March 6, 2008
Which path shall I take?
For the first time in my entire life I don't feel like I owe anything to my parents. In 29 years of life I've never felt like I could have anything for myself. I felt somewhat resentful toward them but I also felt obligated. With Barbara, it was like that syndrome of feeling some sort of connection to one's abuser, only worse because it was mixed with the need of a daughter to have a connection to and be accepted and loved by her mother. Although I let Lu know it's just as ok to be sad or angry as it is to be happy, as her mommy, I also do everything in my power to keep adult situations that have especially upset me, away from her. This is because it never ceases to amaze me how much my eight year old is, emotionally, already a little woman. She feels so deeply, especially toward me. If she sees me crying, she starts crying too. A few times, when she's felt I was not being cared for good enough (by others), she's said, "don't worry mommy, I'll take care of you." The loyalty of a daughter to her mother. Only, unlike my "mother", I respond with, "no baby that's not your job. It's mine to take care of you."
I don't mean this to sound ungrateful because I don't have words to express how much of a burden has been lifted off of my shoulders, but it's going to take me a while to redefine who I am as a person (for almost 30 years) with no one but myself and my family to care for. It might take me a little time to learn to be happy and to relax. I have my ongoing concerns about the holidays or as time passes, what do I do if/when they try to contact us? I've tried to talk to them but they don't hear and so my best chance is to figure out myself and my feelings and if they are too toxic to allow back into my life or not. Everything in my entire life has been unfinished or put off because of the unpredictability of my world.
I had to fill out a questionnaire once for counseling and one of the things it asked was what my dad's expectations for my life where. After thinking about it I realized I had no idea. I called and asked him and he said, "well you know mom and I really never wanted to put any expectations on you kids just in case you couldn't live up to them." Wonderful! So they expected nothing and we became nothing. Great, I guess we lived up to their hopes of us.
Where do I go from here? I know who I am and have no idea how to be that person. I know what I want out of life but have no idea how to accomplish it. In the past year or so I've finally found a bit of confidence and yet I have a long way to go. I've been so terrified of failure my entire life that I just quit before I even tried. It's like I forfeited before I could fail. The dreams that have always been alive in me are the passion for writing and my desire to give Lu an amazing life! I want her to walk gracefully in the areas I fell on my face.
I think overall what I want was best summed up by Erma Bombeck. "When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, "I used everything you gave me".
I don't mean this to sound ungrateful because I don't have words to express how much of a burden has been lifted off of my shoulders, but it's going to take me a while to redefine who I am as a person (for almost 30 years) with no one but myself and my family to care for. It might take me a little time to learn to be happy and to relax. I have my ongoing concerns about the holidays or as time passes, what do I do if/when they try to contact us? I've tried to talk to them but they don't hear and so my best chance is to figure out myself and my feelings and if they are too toxic to allow back into my life or not. Everything in my entire life has been unfinished or put off because of the unpredictability of my world.
I had to fill out a questionnaire once for counseling and one of the things it asked was what my dad's expectations for my life where. After thinking about it I realized I had no idea. I called and asked him and he said, "well you know mom and I really never wanted to put any expectations on you kids just in case you couldn't live up to them." Wonderful! So they expected nothing and we became nothing. Great, I guess we lived up to their hopes of us.
Where do I go from here? I know who I am and have no idea how to be that person. I know what I want out of life but have no idea how to accomplish it. In the past year or so I've finally found a bit of confidence and yet I have a long way to go. I've been so terrified of failure my entire life that I just quit before I even tried. It's like I forfeited before I could fail. The dreams that have always been alive in me are the passion for writing and my desire to give Lu an amazing life! I want her to walk gracefully in the areas I fell on my face.
I think overall what I want was best summed up by Erma Bombeck. "When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, "I used everything you gave me".
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
I BESTOW ON YOU...poetry corner
Written for Miss Lucy when she was a new wee one....
May you grow to be beautiful-may you grow to be giving-may you grow to be wise-and thank God each day you're living-May you always look to Heaven-may every day be a fresh start-may the angels surround you-may Jesus live in your heart-May the last few pennies in your pocket-go to someone with no place to call home-May you offer friendship on a day when you feel friendless-to someone all alone-May God give you self confidence-may He also make you meek-may you hunger for understanding-may God answer when you seek-May you desire to know Jesus-until you see His face-may He bless you with honesty-may He bless you with grace-May people come to you, when they need shelter from life's storms-may you understand God's plans for you-how He knew you before you were even born-May you be a light bringer to a world that's so dark-may you be a ruler to the lost ones-bringing joy to each journey on which you embark-May you know you can come home, when you need to be embraced with open arms-may you turn to the Father, to light your way-and give you discernment to keep you from harm-Most of all, dear little one-don't lose hope when you make mistakes-Just pick yourself up-forgive and move on-don't quit, but remember the stakes-Eyes must see Jesus-hearts must accept-God gave you life-He knew you'd be the best-a soldier for Him-a missionary-God saw a heart of gold-an asset to His army-If you ever doubt you're good enough-to be God's child, little one-Remember God had you in mind-when He sacrificed his son.
(c) J.L. 2008
May you grow to be beautiful-may you grow to be giving-may you grow to be wise-and thank God each day you're living-May you always look to Heaven-may every day be a fresh start-may the angels surround you-may Jesus live in your heart-May the last few pennies in your pocket-go to someone with no place to call home-May you offer friendship on a day when you feel friendless-to someone all alone-May God give you self confidence-may He also make you meek-may you hunger for understanding-may God answer when you seek-May you desire to know Jesus-until you see His face-may He bless you with honesty-may He bless you with grace-May people come to you, when they need shelter from life's storms-may you understand God's plans for you-how He knew you before you were even born-May you be a light bringer to a world that's so dark-may you be a ruler to the lost ones-bringing joy to each journey on which you embark-May you know you can come home, when you need to be embraced with open arms-may you turn to the Father, to light your way-and give you discernment to keep you from harm-Most of all, dear little one-don't lose hope when you make mistakes-Just pick yourself up-forgive and move on-don't quit, but remember the stakes-Eyes must see Jesus-hearts must accept-God gave you life-He knew you'd be the best-a soldier for Him-a missionary-God saw a heart of gold-an asset to His army-If you ever doubt you're good enough-to be God's child, little one-Remember God had you in mind-when He sacrificed his son.
(c) J.L. 2008
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